Out of joint.

"For at the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it. Therefore lift up your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed." Hebrews 12:11-13

I remember, years ago, my younger sister had an injury.

Now, for the life of me, I cannot remember how she managed to do it, or what she was doing when she got the injury, but the outcome was the same -- she had broken her ankle. I remember the complaints about the physiotherapy prescribed, the doctors visits, the infamous garbage bag over her foot and leg when she wanted to shower. Yes, for a young girl not yet quite in her teens, it was an inconvenient and troublesome thing. My dear sister is also quite stubborn (a family trait, I think). All this happened around the same time that she had decided to do the half distance of a cycle-a-thon that a Bible camp we were connected to was running as a fundraiser. My precious father constructed a metal brace for her cast so she could still peddle even in her cast. The dear girl put out an incredible effort. I cannot remember now if she managed to do the whole half distance or not, but her performance for someone with a broken ankle was admirable, regardless.

The delicate thing about this particular handicap, was that the break had occurred right on the growth plate of the bone. The doctors warned that, if it didn't heal properly, there could be a chance that the leg would not grow properly, or she could end up with legs of two different lengths. Now, other than the fact that she considers herself "too short" (which is a lie- she's above average height for both her age and a woman in general), the ankle healed back to normal.

What about when a "break" happens right in the middle of one of our own seasons? When we experience a break in a "personal growth plate"? These breaks are unexpected, unplanned and painful. They seem to occur in the most delicate of places -- those places, that left un-cared for, can cause permanent damage to the growth of our own hearts and minds and spirits.

Isn't it interesting that cleaning and exercising a wounded area is sometimes more painful than the wound itself? I can remember postponing the inevitable alcohol/peroxide swab that would always follow a scrape after playing outside as a child (my mother is a nurse). Oh it burned! Or, in my sisters case, she hated the physiotherapy required to strengthen her damaged ankle. 

We like to forget that not properly caring for a wound or injury can cause much more pain and agony in the long run (like an infected/festering wound or mismatched lengths of leg) than properly dealing with it in the present, however painful it may also be. I have been coming to realize that strength is not pretending a problem doesn't exist, but facing it head on.

Isaiah chapter one was pointed out to me by a friend. She called my attention to the fact that the Israelites were "from the sole of the foot even to the head" covered with "bruises and sores and raw wounds" because they had not allowed God to care for their wounds by pressing them and bandaging them with oil. (Isaiah 1:6) The verse from Hebrews that I started this blog entry with calls the reader to make sure that their lameness isn't "put out of joint" but healed.

How does one do this? Going to Christ and allowing him to minister to our wounds rather than stubbornly trying to fix things on our own or pretending we are stronger is one way. It takes incredible humility to admit weakness and rely on His strength. I am proud by nature, and this is so difficult for me. I like being the strong one. Allowing myself to be weak in the midst of healing is foreign territory for me.

Another way that I don't believe gets enough attention in times of testing: Making sure that our paths are straight. Hebrews 12 says this is the way we make sure we find healing! It's taking an active stance--facing things head on by "lifting up our drooping hands and strengthening our weak knees." It's re-evaluating the road I am currently on and checking to see if there is anything I need to change about the way I am living my current life. It's double-checking with my Savior to see if He is proud of my progress.

Because the truth is, pain, heartbreak, and woundedness can occur at any given moment. Our faith does not protect us from the effects of a sinful world, but instead gives hope within our struggles. Jesus promised we would have trouble in this world, but that trouble does not mean that I can't use it to grow stronger from it. To draw closer to Him in it. To allow him to minister to me in it. To pick myself up off the ground and move forward because of it.

Dear Jesus, I don`t want to stay drooping and weak. I want to move forward. I want you to produce the "fruit of righteousness" in me that will point others to you. If you can use my pain for your good, I give you full permission. You are Good and Sovereign. Amen.